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Apology

To the mistakes I haven't apologized for
The sinned I committed but remained unrepentant
And the lessons I learnt too late in life
To the pirated novels I read over and over again,
Because I can't get enough of the bounty some stories offer
And to the brand new signed copies I abandon,
Leaving them unread, because they fail to amuse me
To the lip color which is no longer in vogue,
But I still have no shame to put it on every now and then
And the lotion I left upside down,
Dripping and escaping its cage
To the conversations I scripted in my head and practiced in front of the mirror,
But never gathered the courage to say it out loud
To the plans I wish I had executed
To the ideas I yearn were of substantial nature
And all the cravings I longed for to be corporeal
To the time I didn't settle for
And the bridges I burned,

The rage I sparked
To the yesterday,
I spent worrying about the future
And the tomorrow,
I will spend regretting over the past
To the obliviousness to opportunities
And denial to shortcomings

To the miles I didn't walk for,
The company I left, the people I cut off
And to the missed calls,
The emails I deleted without opening
And texts I don't read, let alone replying
To the presents I never keep and forward

And the food I bluntly leave without devouring,
To the petals I plucked out,
In the name of determining my lover's affection
And to the anxious mornings,
Where I couldn't bring myself to get out of the bed
To the times when I felt homeless,
Under my roof and within four walls of home
And to the days I wished to run away,
And find the place I belonged to
To the skin, I often claimed to be unfamiliar with
To my blood, that sneaked out so many times,
And to the storms I raised everyday,

I went so shamelessly destructive and abusive
I am sorry for being this clumsy
But I have learned it the hard way
To not settle for anything
Less than love,
Nothing
Less than forever
March 16, 2014 / by / 4 Comments

4 comments:

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    ReplyDelete

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